The original Beauty and the Beast came out here in 1992*, when I was 5. As I’ve previously mentioned, it was the first film I ever saw in the cinema, and the experience was really important to me. I can trace my love for cinema, for film, for everything back to this moment.

I can tell you the exact cinema, the exact screen. I can tell you where we sat, that I had a little pot of vanilla ice cream. I remember sitting with my Nana, and getting excited and overwhelmed by the entire situation. I remember coming out of the film, holding her hand and crying my eyes out as I walked down the stairs with her. I remember her asking why I was crying, and I told her “I was crying with happiness”. (She never, ever let me forget that). As an adult I recognise that what I meant was that I was overwhelmed and amazed by what I’d just seen.  

My dream would have been to see the new film with her, in that same cinema, but unfortunately the cinema has been demolished and she passed away a few years ago.

When the re-release came out for the 20th anniversary, I saw it with some friends and my sister. In the front was a little girl watching it with her mum and nana as well, and I could see me in that little girl. My sister pointed out that she spent a lot of the film simply watching me and my reactions, where I welled up and mouthed along. Apparently I looked younger and happy for the first time in a long time, and I can believe that.

This was my childhood. Belle was my princess, the one that I really connected to. (As I got older, I found myself relating more to the Beast.) These characters were so important to me, a little girl who’d grown up isolated for being ‘weird’ or for having dreams above her station. Belle encouraged me to dream, and to never stop dreaming. I wanted to be something, I wanted adventures, I wanted to get out and see the world, and I have. I wanted to act, to sing, and while those dreams didn’t come true, I still got to do amazing things relating to them.

When the remake was first announced, I was sceptical like everyone was. Slowly the cast filled out, and the people behind the scenes did and it was full of my favourites. Dan Stevens had captured my heart in The Guest and then through a late Downton watch. Luke Evans had sung to me at a premiere the same year, after winning me over in The Hobbit series. Emma Watson was such a perfect choice that I don’t know how I hadn’t thought of it before. Alan Menken back on the music, Josh Gad as the most obvious LeFou ever, it was a dream. I was excited, actually excited. It was in the right hands. 

Everything I’ve seen has been wonderful, the castle, the costumes, the music. It’s all been a joy. I haven’t listened to any new music, or watched any clips. All I’ve seen are the two trailers, and the posters. I never have this level of self-control, but I want to go into it as unspoiled as possible. 5 year old me didn’t have the internet, so she got a completely untainted experience. I want that for 29 year old me as much as possible.

It’s been a long two year wait, and I have been following the progress of this since then, and now it’s finally here and I can’t quite express how excited I am.

When it comes to the film itself, I’m quite easy to please. I know it’s not going to be as good as the original, and I’m fine with that. All I want is a movie with the same spirit as it. I want a film that encourages me to dream, to embrace the fact I don’t fit in, because that’s why I’ve done the things I’ve done. I want something that can stand alongside it as an enjoyable new version. So long as it’s not completely destroyed everything that I hold dear, I’ll be happy with it. 

I don’t quite know what my point is here, just that I’m absolutely beside myself with excitement and I have a lot of feelings.

And I’m almost certain, judging by my reactions to the trailers, that I will be crying with happiness at the end again.

* I’m English, it wasn’t released until October 1992 here.